Stay Off the Fence!

Luke Fence

“Do not set foot on the path of the wicked or walk in the way of evildoers.” Proverbs 4:24 NIV


In the late 80’s, we turned a dreary unused parking lot behind our downtown church in Abilene into a lovely courtyard and children’s playground with tall, modular slides and climbing equipment for the boys and girls to play on. A beautiful ten-foot brick wall securely enclosed the entire area, preventing children from running into the nearby busy street.

One Wednesday night as Grant and I sat in Fellowship Hall visiting with friends, our 5-year-old son Drew slipped out the back door, down the stairs and onto the playground to play – alone. Thankfully, a few minutes later, one of the dads saw him and quickly rushed to rescue him from certain disaster. Drew, our “climber”, had crawled over the upper peak of the tornado slide and somehow (it still makes me catch my breath) maneuvered himself to the TOP of the brick wall, and was walking it like a tight rope. I’m glad he was down and safe before I knew what had happened!

As a child and teenager, I was guilty of a different kind of fence walking. Many times when an adult gave me a rule, I’d feel challenged to see just how close I could get to the line of demarcation, without crossing over and breaking the rule. Often I walked on the line because I was only told I couldn’t cross the line. With one wrong move, my reckless attitude could have been as dangerous as if Drew had taken a wrong step on that playground wall!

The very first rule God gave Adam and Eve in the garden was that they could not eat the fruit from the tree of knowledge of good and evil. They were told not to even touch it (Gen.3:3). The closer we get to sin, the easier it is for temptation to win us over. The devil is alive and well, whispering “the grass is greener on the other side”. When you try to walk the non-existent line between good and evil, it’s easy to lose your balance and fall in!

Children are curious…or ornery like I was, and naturally want to get close to things that are forbidden. The reality is, your authority won’t always be enough to keep them safely under your umbrella of protection. Keep the lines of communication open. Stay involved in their lives – even when they try to push you out. Know who their friends are. Get to know the parents of their friends. Monitor their activities. Stand your ground and never compromise principles. Pray without ceasing. Love them unconditionally. And for those times they make it to the top of the fence anyway…be close enough to help catch them when they fall.


Prayer: Heavenly Father, thank You for protecting me when I  made bad choices as a teenager. Please keep my children safe and help me know how to guide them without pushing them into rebellion. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

Who Do You Call?

“The Lord is my light and my salvation; Whom shall I fear? The Lord is the defense of my life; Whom shall I dread?”

Psalm 27:1 NIV


It was early January, and the kids were still out of school for Christmas break. Grant and I had to go back to work. Mid-afternoon one day, I received a frantic call from my oldest daughter, Gwen, telling me I had to come home immediately because the police were on the way to our house. Apparently sibling rivalry had run amuck with no parents at home to referee our two preteen girls, and a great shouting match had erupted. Drew, having just learned how to handle emergencies, did what any concerned 5-year-old might do. He called 9-1-1 and said, “Help! My sisters are fighting!” And then he hung up.

Unfortunately for Gwen and Shannon, the Abilene Police Department had caller ID and they immediately called back to assess the problem. Gwen’s quick hang-up was probably not the best response to make. Needless to say, we were properly embarrassed when our house was listed in the Abilene Reporter News police notes as “Call for domestic violence”.

The fact is, life gives us plenty of reasons to need someone we can call on for help — and 9-1-1 won’t be the answer. Our children need to know we are a safe and trustworthy sounding board for them. When they are hurt or afraid, those feelings are their reality and must be respected and taken seriously. If we dismiss their fears, criticize them, or even worse…ridicule them, we are not the protectors they need us to be.

Listen to your child. Never make fun of their thoughts or concerns. Walk alongside them through their “crisis”, and help them find ways to solve their problem. Pray with them and teach them to pray for themselves. Remind them God will always be with them, even when you can’t be.


PrayerGod, I am so grateful! You are a BIG God and You watch over my children even when I’m not around. I ask You to keep them free from fear and help them trust in You for their protection. Help me be a trustworthy confidante for them, always listening and never judgmental. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

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